Our thoughts can cloud our judgement, and thoughts unexamined become false beliefs

If we do too much photoshop, use too many filters, retaking, until we get just the right angles, we miss a lot of shots that were perfect in that moment; opportunities that were/are available to us now.

“I can’t do that” and I”’m just not ready yet,” are by far two of the biggest reasons I hear from people, women especially, for why they aren’t doing something or why something can’t be so. We abandon and put off our own desires because we think there is US, the us that wants that thing, still “not ready” or still “unable” presiding. However, existing simultaneously along the side of us that can’t and the side of us that is just not ready, is the us that CAN and the us that is entirely READY. And the US we choose MOST OF THE TIME, is the one that will take precedence in our lives. 

Our thoughts cloud our judgement, and thoughts unexamined become false beliefs. Just because we believe a thing to be so does not make it true. What we believe acts as true until we create a new belief. We act not just according to our thoughts but we act according to our beliefs. When we can begin to match who we are with who we think we are, we are on to something great because our internal thoughts and beliefs begin to match our external actions and behaviors. Want to know what you believe about yourself?

Just begin to take a daily inventory of your actions. Our daily actions will in someway match our thoughts and our beliefs. If we don’t think we are ready or if we don’t  think we can do a thing, then we will procrastinate or we will never get started because we will think so many things have to take place first before the thing we want can happen. 

Your Negative Beliefs Are Keeping You Stuck!

As a trainer, I often hear people complaining about their body, but are not willing to do anything about it. They talk about it with such comments as “I’ve always been this way. I’ve always had a stomach. Everyone in my family is cursed with [ fill in the blank],” never realizing that the more they emphasize the negative, the more it persists.  What we believe exists, persists. Their focus on the negative is keeping them stuck. We must focus on the positive and take actions that align with our desires. We want a flatter stomach, we must believe this is possible. Our beliefs, good or bad, positive or negative are the catalyst behind our actions and our results. 

 

In a nutshell (and make that a walnut shell), how do we change? How do we get unstuck? We stop pretending that everything is ok, being subservient to the statements we continually tell ourselves. We begin telling ourselves better feeling stories. “Even though I am not exactly where I want to be, even though I have this stomach that drives me nuts, I am going to love myself anyway.” And this is how we change. We begin from a place of love. A person who loves themselves will take actions that match. In the same regard, a person who is not happy with themselves, will take actions that match. When we change the stories, we change the patterns within our bodies. When we change old patterns, we make room for new patterns to emerge. What we once thought was a life-long curse is now just a new belief away. When we make the conscious effort to align ourselves with our desires, we in turn change. It’s not rocket science, but the science that we have the power to change our beliefs, and change the patterns that are keeping us stuck. We are our best resource for change. Everything begins and ends with us. 

Belief followed by action will invoke lasting change.

Love and Lunges, 

Sara

We Aren't Broken and We Don't Need Fixing

It is easier to say something is wrong with us than to talk about all the things that are right with us. So long as we think something is wrong with us, we are then able to make excuses for all the reasons why something is or isn’t working out for us. As long as we are able to make the excuses sound valid enough, no one will question, including ourselves, why we’re still at point A when really where we want to be, is at point B. Between point A, where we are currently and point B, where we really want to be are these silly things called thoughts getting in our way. These thoughts, whether we want to admit it or not, are the vehicle driving our lives. We have so many of them, we don't even stop to question if they are true or not. We’ve let our minds go on auto-pilot, thinking at will what we want to think, validating and accepting as fact the ones that solidify and make certain our beliefs. It is these thoughts that are getting in our way. 

I use to diagnose myself with low self esteem and social anxiety. So long as I had either of these, I could make excuses for all the reasons why I didn't like my body, why I wasn’t more successful,  still single, why Ididn’t go out more often or why after eleven years,  I still had a hard time asking my clients to pay me for services rendered. 

I don’t have low self esteem issues and I don’t have social anxiety.  What I do have is, I have a lot of unbridled thoughts, thoughts that have run through my mind like a commentary and have convinced me over the years that I have a problem or a series of problems for that matter and until I fix these problems, point B or the things I want and don’t have, will be just out of reach. It actually feelsfunny and at the same time freeing to say this.

“Unbridled thoughts?” See, there I go thinking again. I believed, for the most part,  my thinking was pretty much on course, structured and limited to only what would keep me moving in a positive direction. If something wasn’t going right, I had a prayer for it. If I wanted this to happen, I had an affirmation.  My anecdote for anything and everything was to have perfect thoughts, and if something wasn’t working out, well, then maybe I needed to find a better more concise affirmation. Perhaps I needed a longer gratitude list or I needed to word my intention in just the right way so to make sure God fully understood what it was I was intending to have happen. 

When I stopped thinking so damn much, that is when my life really began to shift. Let me repeat, When I stopped thinking so damn much, that is when my life really began to shift. People spend years trying to get tuned back in to this innate wisdom, the wisdom that is there inside of all of us if we will just stop long enough to recognize its presence.  So many of the things we are striving for, love, connectedness, peace and happiness are already in us.  Until then, when something is wrong, we think, I must need a new strategy. I’m feeling negative. Opps, I forgot to do my morning affirmations. Efffff! I didn’t do my daily meditation. Great! Now I for sure have to wait until at least tomorrow to see if my dreams are going to manifest. How stressful is all this? Haha. I chuckle because when I really start to look at it, it’s really stressful. I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t. 

So as not to fully discount all the work I’ve been doing to better myself. It is not bad. In fact, I’d say a lot of things transpired as a result of many of these practices I have become accustomed to, but in my attempt to be more spiritual, I felt myself becoming more cut-off and limited in my beliefs, and rather than enjoy my life more, I was enjoying it less.   So then, why is finding peace not more peaceful? Because of that very thought. The thought that says, we have to find peace. So long as we think we have to find it, we see it as something to be attained, a state of being in the future we are still striving for.  We have tried so hard for years to live by the wisdom of others, reading this book, listening to this sermon or going to that workshop, we have forgotten that there is a wisdom inside us that is always available. We have a source, 24/7/365, that has all the answers. Herein,  lies our peace. When we sit down, relax and recognize that peace is already there within us, we are at peace.

Mind. Your. Muscles.

Love and Lunges, 

Sara

How To Be Skinny!

As I sat drinking my coffee this morning, I began contemplating a title for a future book. As I began thinking of catchy titles, the most catchy title that came to me was, How To Be Skinny. Really? Is that all you can come up with? I thought to myself. How can you say you support health and wellbeing when the only title you can come up with is on how to be skinny? I don’t care who you are, what age you are, religion or sexual preference, there is feeling that transcends all other feelings when we feel skinny. Do I support anorexia, and eating disorders, all the things known to help us achieve a smaller body? No, of course not. Being skinny and feeling good about the size we are is not a number on a scale or how our clothes fit, it is a feeling. When we feel good about our body, it is not going to matter what the scale says or quite how our clothes are fitting. When we have good feelings, this means we are having good thoughts regarding ourselves, and this is in turn creates our experience.

 This summer has been challenging for me as is every other summer. While I like my legs to be small,  it seems, they like to be bigger than I prefer.  Being bigger, my shorts are tight. When my shorts are tight, I don’t feel as good about myself. I feel I should be working harder, maybe eating less, doing all the things that will help me be skinny. The interesting thing is, is that as of recent, I feel skinny. Yes, my shorts are tighter than I prefer, no the scale is not my perfect number, but I actually feel good about my body. I look in the mirror and I see a body that reflects both strength and beauty. Without being nitpicky, and critical of everything not quite perfect with my exterior self, I find I am happy, healthy and whole. My body tends to fluctuate anywhere between 3 to 5 pounds on any given day or week.  Rather than fight my body, I am better learning to go with the flow.

Being skinny is an inside job. If we don’t do the internal work to change or rather recognize our thoughts and the persistent internal dialogue that tells us we need to work harder, look better, be smaller, it won’t matter how big or small we are on the outside. I have seen the smallest most beautiful people think they are fat, and bigger, less attractive people by society’s standards think they look great and exude a confidence that says, I am good just the way I am. So how do we be skinny? By bypassing the thoughts and feelings that tell us otherwise. Self care. This means not harping on our bodies and doing things that make us feel good. 
 

Mind. Your. Muscles. 

Love and Lunges,

Sara

To Exercise OR Not To Exercise

Do we celebrate the small victories as much as the big ones?  I felt so accomplished yesterday knowing I had done the butte seven times or the equivalent of 14 miles. Today, however, when I ran, I didn’t have the same level of satisfaction. Today, I only did two times up the butte. Why did I stop after just two times? Because my body was telling me to stop.  Yes, I know the quote, I’m sure I have even posted it before: If you train your mind, your body will follow. However, today I want to point out, that it was not my mind that was giving up. My body really was telling me to stop. I’m not going to lie. It was hard to stop. It was hard to not just do at least one more time up the butte, at least get in three times or the equivalent of six miles, but it was against my better judgement. I got to the bottom where normally I turn around to go back up, and I stopped, thought for a moment how much I wanted to do it just one more time, and then proceeded to head towards my car and call it a day.  That was hard. The hard part, for those of us that like to do too much,  is resting, when everything within us is saying, Go! I constantly tell my clients, Don’t over do it, and I need to be able to heed my own advice. It is not the quantity of exercise that makes our body better, but the quality of the exercises performed.  

 

When you exercise, be mindful. If you have been doing a lot, and in my case I have, listen to those gentle nudges from the universe telling you it is time to take a break and rest. I don’t need a schedule that tells me “Rest Day,” I just need to listen to my body and my inner guidance that is always available giving me answers. When we don’t listen, when we go against our better judgement, often there is a period of regret. We exhaust ourselves, get injured or worse yet make ourselves sick. Our bodies are an intelligent system always telling us what is good for us if we will just listen. So today, I celebrate the small victory of not over doing it, and taking it easy when I am told to do so. 

 

Love and Lunges, 

Sara 

www.realwomenhavemuscles.com

 

Eating Thorns

In her book “Tears to Triumph,” Marianne Williamson shares one of the rarer traits of hungry peacocks – sometimes they are willing to eat thorns when food is especially scarce. It is purported that ingesting the thorns is in some way responsible for producing the beautiful plumage male peacocks are known for.

Whether this is scientifically true is up for debate, however it provides us with a beautiful metaphor. The things that are often hardest to digest, are the things that transform us in the most positive ways. The hard-edged “bitter thorns” of human experience whether it be the loss of a job, a loved one, heartbreak,  betrayal from a friend are our initiation leading us from sorrow to triumph. The greatest lessons did not come when everything was going well, but the greatest lessons came when life threw us a curve ball. 

You often hear people say, “One day, you will look back on this time as one of the best things to happen,”  as though they already know.  I always say, “2011 was one the worst years of my life,” and it was. Anything that could go wrong, did. I can look back now and think, it wasn’t all bad, and I learned some valuable lessons about myself despite all the agony.  Through all the emotional pain, I experienced forgiveness for myself and others. Suffering betrayal, I experienced the incredible power of forgiveness and compassion. 

Anything and everything if we will allow it, can be a platform for a miracle.  Eating “thorns” aren’t all bad as we emerge through the suffering more loving human beings. The loss of love, a business deal gone bad or loss of a friendship force us to look at the darkness within ourselves and choose love which is our light.  

Your Weekly Rx: Mind. Your. Muscles.

Are You Doing What You Love?

It is so easy sometimes to become bogged down, disappointed and feel we are lacking purpose.  Growing up in a very quote, unquote conservative christian home, I was guilt ridden thinkingthat if I wasn't serving in a church on Sunday, I was somehow off-track and far from where I needed to be.  I later learned and have come to define service as sharing our passions with the world. We show love by doing what we are passionate about. If you are a nurse, be the best nurse you can be. If you are a secretary, then be the best at what you do. I became a trainer because I love being fit and sharing that passion with others. I go to work to spread joy, to help others feel better about themselves and their body. Oh, and I happen to make money in the process.

My passion is to exhort women, to encourage them and build them up to be strong in body and mind. MIND YOUR MUSCLES is a call to strengthen your inner and outer muscles daily. We are powerful creatures, not because of anything we have done but because of the love that is inside us. “It is our light not our darkness that frightens us most.” Darkness is the absence of light. Fear and anxiety are a deviation from the light.  They keep us stuck and cover our light. If we are fearful and anxious all the time, we won’t be able to move forward and share our passions with others.  We shift from thoughts of love to that of fear.  Fear is what we know. Love is what we are.  

So how do we shift? How do we live our passions? By taking action. If we want to write, then write. If we want to dance, we dance.  Waiting is a sorry signal to send out in to the universe.  Our job is to spread joy. We do this by doing and taking part in things we love.

Love and Lunges, 

Sara

www.realwomenhavemuscles.com

Integrity Counts

 

If you want to increase your happiness and confidence, then only conduct and participate in activities that you believe are right. This is based on your inner compass and no one else's. This is about aligning your actions to your inner knowingness of what you know is right for you, and no one else.  When we are being true to ourselves, this is called integrity. Everyone may not agree with you, and some may even judge you for your conduct.  Only you know what is right for you. Taking actions you feel good about has a way of improving the relationship you have with yourself. Sometimes I think we feel as though our hands are tied, as though we are stuck, and forced to take an action we don't want to take. This is not so. We always have a choice and the sooner we realize this, the happier we will be. 

Sit quietly with yourself. Ask yourself, are the actions I am taking what I believe in my heart to be right? Do I feel good about the decisions I am currently making? If not, how can I improve them? Be honest with yourself. No one has to know your answers except you. It's your life. Live it with integrity.